Here it is almost half six and I have been awake for almost 2 hours already. Did I mention it was also Saturday?
I don't normally wake up this early, but this thing called work, yeah, that made me get up this early. But it’s OK, and this post is a positive.
I love walking to work, I mean, I don't walk that far, probably not even a kilometre, but it’s the only exercise I do, so I like it.
It also gives me time to think. Time to reflect and time to think about my day/week/year/life. A lot of thinking gets done on that walk.
I appreciate when a work mate sees me and offers me a lift, but I like my thinking time.
Sometimes I just listen to music and drift off, am oblivious to the world around me, and sometimes just for a few steps, I close my eyes. Have you ever done that, be walking out in public and close your eyes while you walk?
I do it often. When I'm alone, that is.
I thought I was the only person who did it, but then I twitter'ed it and a friend of mine also admitted he did it too. I don't know what it is, but it feels like I'm dreaming or something. Do it, next time you’re in public, but alone and walking. Just even to see what it’s like.
I feel like my attitude on my walk is going to play how I am for the rest of the day. And most of the time it works out that way.
Sometimes I have conversations in my head with the people I work with. Usually they are good conversations. Sometimes not.
Today, I thought about my life and why I am the way I am. And I wrote this part of this post in my head, so if it’s muddled and jumbled welcome to my head.
If someone was to ask me to why I am the way I am, and how I got about this way, this would be my answer.
My life hasn't been easy. Not the hardest life ever, but not easy either. My life has been scarred from experiences. Some bad - heartbreak, neglect -somewhat-, divorce, molestation, choices, hurt, and pain. (Hurt being emotional, pain being physical). But also, good - love, happiness, amazing friendships, great -somewhat- family. Now while the bad doesn't outweigh the good, it did make me who I am, and I don’t know if I would have liked the person I was without it. The good only made the person I am better. I like me. I like the person I am. I like my life.
While I have things that people may strive to get - a house (rented, but mine), a husband, a job, good hair (sometimes) and travel. I also strive to get things that others have as well. And while I don’t have these things now, I know that the person I am will help me get those things.
And I like that. I like me.
And its reasons like this, I like my walk to work, it makes me think of things like this. It makes me realise that yes, it may be hard now, but it will be good again. Life is good. Always. Even when you think it’s not.
Life is good.
Ps. I know that the title is a movie, but as lame as it is, I saw this movie with an awesome friend of mine, and I'm pretty sure it was the first movie that made me cry.
PPs. Also, this is the first day of two weeks where I have to start work at 7am. I hope this attitude continues. And if I can be this upbeat this early in the morning, none of y'all have any excuses.